Sunday, December 22, 2013

It's Not About Sex, It's About Children

Does God hate sex?  Forgive the question, but after all of these discussions about religion and sexuality, one might think so.  Don’t worry, I realize we are all a bit weary of the debate over Phil Robertson’s comments, and so I will mostly leave that discussion for other forums.  But as a starting point, his comments have opened up discussion across the country about God and morality, sexuality and tolerance and free speech.

It does seem that sexual activity is pretty high on the list of no-no’s, things that might keep one from getting to heaven.  From adultery and prostitution to fornication and pornography, sex outside of a pretty specific set of circumstances would seem to be sinful.  And it does seem to be the case pretty universally, at least amongst the religions claiming Abraham as their Patriarch. 
 In 1 Corinthians 6 the apostle Paul lists some of those things that would prevent one from getting into the kingdom of heaven, and inappropriate sexuality is prominent in the list.  The Catholic Catechism tells us self gratification is not ok, as well as contraception.  Mormons and Baptist and Amish are big on chastity, and the Muslims have their women cover themselves so as not to excite and tempt the men.
Why is there all of the concern amongst the religious about controlling sexuality?  Is it, as we started out, because God hates sex?  I don’t think so.  I think the concerns come from century upon century of experiencing the human condition play out, and it turns out uncontrolled sexuality has caused a lot of pain to humanity.  But sex within marriage with a committed, loving partner is a beautiful thing.  It is the basis of the family and also of our society.
This week we celebrate the birth of Jesus.  Jesus was born without sin, of a virgin mother.  Mary and Joseph were poor folks, but good parents.  Joseph took Mary as his wife knowing he was not responsible for her being with child.  He made her respectable and raised the child as his own, because it was the right thing to do.  He knew the importance of family and of a child having parents that care for him.  

Imagine for a moment if they had decided not to have that baby.  What would the world have lost?  Think of the birth of that baby and the difference in this world if it had not come to pass.  Jesus was a Jew, a descendent of Abraham who literally changed the history of the world, whether you believe he was the messiah or not.
I think sometimes people misunderstand why conservatives feel so strongly about so-called “family values”.  It is not so much that they want to control the personal lives of others.  It is not so much a Carrie Nation-type crusade to make sure everyone holds to one set of moral values.  It is not about sex, it is about children.
The children are our future, and I do not just mean my future, which at this point is only a few more decades.  I am talking about the future of our nation, the future of mankind.  Regular readers will know how I feel about leaving a massive pile of debt to our grandchildren.  We owe it to future generations to give them an education, and we are currently doing a pretty bad job of that.  We owe them a world of opportunity and freedom and peace, and we have some work to do there too.
Our kids are growing up with Miley Cyrus twerking and internet porn and Grand Theft Auto.  They are getting a dumbed-down Common Core education, a pile of debt, and dismal prospect for employment.  It’s not all bleak, bad news but we really must do better.  We need to change the culture and raise expectations and perhaps change our value system as a society.


For me, it starts with respect, and love, and honesty.  Men need to respect women.  Parents must respect their children.  We have to show more love, and with love comes tolerance.  And we have to restore a culture of honesty.  And it starts with me; and you.  It has to start now.  For me, it means respecting the value of each and every life.  It means loving people who do not meet my standards, and realizing that I am one of those people too.
Sex is a wonderful and precious thing.  It is (should be) an expression of love between two people.  But more importantly, sex is the genesis of life.  Each and every one of us, (with the exception of the one whose birthday we celebrate this week), exists as a result of a sexual union between one man and one woman.  That, in my view, makes sex a magical and wonderful thing.
But as history has shown, sex outside of love and a committed relationship can lead to the birth of an unwanted child, or a child born to parents that are not ready or able to raise it.  Sometimes the father does not stick around.  Sometimes the mother is little more than a child herself.  We have a lot of children in this world growing up without proper families, or support systems, and without the safety and security of a good home.  Our children are our most precious asset, and they are the future of our nation and our world.  They need for us to be the adults, and to show them what is valuable and important, and how to live life.  As a society we need to step up to that task.
I wonder as I look back on this week what kind of sound bite we would have gotten had the press been able to interview Jesus of Nazareth on current events.  I am no authority but I think there would have been love and respect and humility and wisdom in that answer instead of what sounded a bit like anger and self righteousness at times this week.
Life is the most precious thing we have.  Our lives, and the lives of our friends and family and society.  I am pro-life and by that I mean a lot of things.  It means I do not believe in the death penalty, and that I see war as a last resort.  And yes, it also means that I oppose abortions.  I know it is a sensitive topic, but I just think my respect for human life must start at the beginning, and the beginning is conception, when sperm meets egg and a new and unique set of DNA comes into existence. 
I know some of you disagree, but hopefully we can agree that if people are not ready to raise a child, and raise it properly, then they should not create one.  It really is as simple as that.  That is why cultures throughout history and to this day try to avoid the devaluing of sex.  The cheapening of sex between humans has been around for centuries; that is why Paul wrote about it.  There have always been prostitutes and fornication and adultery, and yes, homosexuality.  This is not a new issue.  But in the end it is not about the sex, it is about the children. 
Children need to be born into a stable and loving family and taught values and love and respect.  If they see the adults in their lives do not value honesty and hard work and education and self reliance, then they will not value those things.  And if we do not value families and love and peace, neither will they.  And if they see us having sex and creating babies just to abort them as a matter of convenience, so will they.
As a libertarian I respect your right to live your life as you please.  But I would ask that you respect other humans and their choices, and please do not create new life unless you are ready.

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